A Monday's distraction
For this (belated) Friday’s distraction, I present for your amusement a real life story. Most of the events described below actually occurred (in one fashion or another) with the unfortunate part being that they happened to me. The tale begins with my unusually prompt arrival at the RDU for my flight to O’hare. Having been notified by United (go SMS flight updates!) that my flight was going to be minimally delayed, I had steeled myself mentally for the wait. Little did I know that this 30 minute delay would turn into a three hour ordeal. As the departure time advanced further and further into the night, I decided that beyond steel, my mind needed liquid reinforcement. A short jaunt down the terminal found me at the neighborhood “bar & grill”, a locale soon to be filled with the rest of the crew from the SS Minnow.
A couple *cough* libations and a sandwich later, the witching hour was upon us and I was on my United flight, serviced by United Express, operated by Mesa Airlines, part of the Star Alliance. What all of that has to do with getting me from point A to point B I have no idea, but it seemed very important to the flight attendants to mention each and every one of those relationships and therefore it should be important to me (I guess). Marketing 101 tells us that branding is almost as important as confusing your customers to the point that they can’t make a rational decision since they don’t understand the product, therefore making them more likely to purchase a ticket on your airline as they’re very much uncertain which carrier it actually is. Yet I digress. Two hours later I had successfully arrived in Chicago, thinking the worst was behind me. That feeling of relief should have been the first clue that I was about to get screwed again, this time by the CTA. Having found a comfortable seat on the blue line (clue #2 to the bending over that was about to occur), I was eagerly expecting our departure when a voice boomed over the megaphone and before I could say “God, is that you?” we were told to switch trains due to a mechanical fault. Begrudgingly giving up my seat, I followed the herd to another set of subway cars. As cruel fate (or a bored CTA employee) would have it, there was something wrong with that train as well. So yet again, I picked up all of my worldly (erm, travelingly?) belongings and moved to a third train. This process of shuffling us around took over half an hour, with the crowd of people wanting to get onto the blue line constantly growing. Why there was such demand for public transportation at 11pm is baffling, but a subway car stuffed like sardines with the traveling elite, was a testament to the human desire to make my life miserable.
Score
Mike: 0 - For all of the reasons above
Guiness: 1 - For making a tasty libation
United whatever-line: 1 - For great marketing
CTA: 0 - You just suck